Advice

[gamegirl]

My son started kindergarten last week and up until yesterday I had been thinking things were going great. His teacher called me after school to let me know of Richie's behavior, and I am not talking just one thing. She said he was very talkative in class, kept snapping his fingers, punching his friends(in a playful way but still not appropriate in class), and that he had to be moved numerous times because of his disruptiveness. When I asked if it was just this particular day she said it had actually been going on since day 1, but that she knows it is a transition and was trying to see if his behavior would change. I want to nip it in the bud now. What sucks is that he does so well with his work- always getting every part right, but his behavior stinks. I really don't know how to handle this as he is my first so I am just trying to get some advice.

[Sgt. Sheck]

Your son sounds like a replica of me. I'm an honors student who usually gets A's, but I'm ultra-disruptive and talkitive. I've been this way since Kindergarten. Whenever I got a bad report, my parents would take something away from me. And I don't mean threaten to or just for a week. They would unplug my fuckin' SNES for a month.

Take strong, hard measures with your kid that aren't over the top or drastic. Restrict him from watching TV or eating sweets. Let him know that there are times when he can talk, but it's not appropriate during lessons. If problems persist, made harder and harder punishment. If he does good, reward him. Make it clear, since they're still young, that good behavior comes with rewards, and bad comes with a lack of TV.

[freekDAWG]

Give him a spinning piledriver.

[Anthony Ammo]

I was basically going to say what Sheck said.

Then I thought of something else, but Bolo Yeung said it.

So I got nothing.

[Double O]

What he's doing is a: trying to get attention, and b: trying to establish a role, somewhere inside he feels a little inadequate and has to do negative things to try and establish some sort of dominance. Cant say that for sure, but i used to get the shite kicked out me when i was a kid and then started doing that myself.....check he's not being bullied in any way, cos these situations are NEVER black and white. What is important is not to start casting blame in any way.....let us know how you get on!

[gamegirl]

I went with shecks approach...he was made to go up in his room with no TV, poker, Gameboy, snacks, etc for the rest of the night. That was after his father and I sat him down and had a talk with him. It just makes me mad cause he is such a smart boy- he knows the rules but he just doesn't follow them. He has a rule book that they colored pictures for each of the class rules and although he cannot read yet he can tell me what every single rule was. Hopefully things will get better because if this does not work then I really don't know what to do.

Thanks for the advice guys! I'll keep yous posted.

[Double O]

Cool! keep us posted!

[freekDAWG]

For starters, don't take him to the friggin Children's Museum the day after you punish him! Sheesh.



(She did that. Everybody call her a fool.)

[Fignuts Beta]

fool.... I'm such a tool

[Xfiles]

I always do that shit with my daughter. I get on her case and punish her about something and then I feel like shit about it and ten minutes later punishment time is over. Although if she touches daddies new shoes...it's game on! She threw nessy's high heels in the toilet...the outcome wasn't pleasent.

[SouthernGlitter]

Listen there are several reasons for his behavior...

He is starting school which has lots of structure to it, he is away from you all day, things are changing and he is trying to figure it out.


IF it continues try behavior modification...

Get marbles,poker chips (write points on them), or anything you can use as a point system...

Make out a chart of things he needs to do to earn points, if he doesnt how many points you take away, and post it where you both can see it... if he cant read yet then use pictures.

Have him tell you things he loves to do and make him earn points by doing things before he can do them.

Work on it together.

TRUST me when I tell you this works......

[Gia]

GG, he maybe just bored. The teacher may need to give him more things to do to keep him busy. Im not sure if you know what the pre-mack principle is, but the teacher may need to incorporate it in this class. Basically it is focusing on the "good things" he is doing, verus giving him attention for the bad. Example...when he is in his seat she should compliment him on that, instead of reacting to him being out of his seat. I wont bore you with all the details, but I am working in an ED class for teen-agers alterative education and thats how we do it.

[Shamdaman]

Man, I was just ganna say smack em......smack em hard!!!











Honestly though there are so many differing opinions out there that one will get to him and will work, every kid is different so I guess its trial and error for a while. Although I have seen that point system in action and it does seem to work, but only if the parent/s are strict and stick to the rules that both the kid and parent/s make. Out of interest what did you you used to do to him as punishment before kindergarden (what a wierd name for primary 1! Sheesh! Americans!)

I suppose it could be that he is just a mad wee nutjob waiting for a slamming cell door but I really doubt it at this point :)