SouthernGlitter
10-22-2004, 10:10 AM
First off I am not wanting critcism here just a little bit of advice. So please try to keep it reasonable.
Ok you guys I KNOW there are some of you on here that know about my daughters biological father. Well after 10 years he decided he wants to be a part of her life. My husband and I sat down and told her about him a few weeks ago.
The bad thing is .... he says he wants to be in her life, but still he won't talk to us, call or write her, or anything.
I will never say a bad word against this man.. there is ALOT of history with my husband, him and myself so this is more complicated than it sounds. He is a good man. I did find out however he still drinks quite a bit. I know he works about 6 days a week and that it is hard to catch him, but still...
He didn't believe me when I first told him I was going to have a baby and about 3 years ago he started thinking about it.. He knows I would never lie to him. I have known him longer than I have my husband. He knows I would never hurt him in anyway. He was just really messed up back then I think. Alot of emotional inner demons he was dealing with. He knew that me and my hubby were going to get back together no matter what and has told me he thought the child would have a better life with us.. so that is why he let me leave. I understand all that.. my point is he could have been in her life alot sooner had he had a little bit of smarts about him.. instead of thinking ONLY for himself..
NOW the advice I need is this.. Do I continue to make excuses for why he doesn't call or write my daughter? Do I continue to try to talk with him? (we are friends and we talk as though nothing has changed EXCEPT my feelings). Do I just say screw it you had your chance and just be done? I don't know.. :confused:
Any suggestions? Any ideas? I will answer any questions you guys ask as long as they are reasonable.. as I stated in the beginning please no criticism.. I just want advice..
Ok you guys I KNOW there are some of you on here that know about my daughters biological father. Well after 10 years he decided he wants to be a part of her life. My husband and I sat down and told her about him a few weeks ago.
The bad thing is .... he says he wants to be in her life, but still he won't talk to us, call or write her, or anything.
I will never say a bad word against this man.. there is ALOT of history with my husband, him and myself so this is more complicated than it sounds. He is a good man. I did find out however he still drinks quite a bit. I know he works about 6 days a week and that it is hard to catch him, but still...
He didn't believe me when I first told him I was going to have a baby and about 3 years ago he started thinking about it.. He knows I would never lie to him. I have known him longer than I have my husband. He knows I would never hurt him in anyway. He was just really messed up back then I think. Alot of emotional inner demons he was dealing with. He knew that me and my hubby were going to get back together no matter what and has told me he thought the child would have a better life with us.. so that is why he let me leave. I understand all that.. my point is he could have been in her life alot sooner had he had a little bit of smarts about him.. instead of thinking ONLY for himself..
NOW the advice I need is this.. Do I continue to make excuses for why he doesn't call or write my daughter? Do I continue to try to talk with him? (we are friends and we talk as though nothing has changed EXCEPT my feelings). Do I just say screw it you had your chance and just be done? I don't know.. :confused:
Any suggestions? Any ideas? I will answer any questions you guys ask as long as they are reasonable.. as I stated in the beginning please no criticism.. I just want advice..